She was ..

a girl who selfish, an arrogant, she was a girl who never really care about her appearance. She didn’t want to talk with stranger. she never smile with someone who she didn’t know. She was a girl who difficult to say sorry for her mistake. She never unbeatable. She almost got everything what she want, didn’t need more effort. But, how bad she is, she has many friends who love her.

A few years later,

she grew up. She understood when she did mistake, she should say sorry. She tried to control her ego. She learnt communicate very well with everyone. She appreciated everyone who love her and she promised to love them more. She told to herself she would like a mirror “If you love me, I love you more. If you hurt me, I hurt you more” but she couldn’t do this.

She began falling in love. She happy. She ever felt broken heart.  She cried. She hurt. She began again. She ever acted like she was happy, she hid her sorrow for made her love happy. She never heard her heart and her brain until no more reason for her to survive.

In the other side, she failed for something. She didn’t get what she want. She need more effort for got something . She down. She thought she failed to made her parents proud of her.

And now,

she should have thank God a real much, she understand that hurt makes she stronger, makes she really really really appreciate everyone who still stay for her, no matter what she did before, no matter how many she did mistake, no matter how bad she is. She is lucky for having a completely parents who really love her and having bestfriends who always understand her. From every journey that she faced, she learnt many things,

She will say sorry for every mistake that she did, sometimes she punish herself because she ever did something wrong even she look fine outside, deep in her heart she think it and in the end she try to forgive herself.

She realize that she have to think by hear her heart and brain, not her ego.

She promise for never put her happiness in someone else’s hand and never ruin the other’s happiness.

She doesn’t want like a mirror, she tell to her mind “Love me, I love you more. Hate me, it’s your problem”.

She will fight for something that she want and if she failed, she believe God’s plan better than everything.

She doesn’t want to blame someone who hurt her, no, she let them to did it.

And many things again. At least, she feel sorry for did so many mistake. For hurt some people. For hurt some people that she love. For foolishness that she ever did. She still learn for change her life better. With everyone who love her. 

Dear God, thank you for every people that has sent to her, either they are a lesson and a blessing. Thank you for always stay beside on her for remind and make her awake for her mistake and her foolishness, thank you for loving her. And the last thank you for wake her up in every morning. She knows You gives her a chance for change her life. She is grateful, she get so many affection from You. 

And she is me :)